mc94301
2003/05/08
      ( 11:43 AM ) cxjo  
i started taking these, and now i'm trouble free!
i used to think i was depressed.
but then i can be so happy sometimes.. it just doesn't make sense.
i have random bouts of creative power where i get a bunch of stuff done and am continually stressed and tense.
sometimes i feel really sad. no reason. i've confessed.

sometimes i'm overjoyed.
i can't stop laughing at the stupidest jokes, they literally make me cry and fall out of my chair.
people stare.
i listen to pink floyd.

sometimes i stay up really late and drink lots of coffeee and write lots of music and poetry and sometimes i just want to sleep.
i almost NEVER want to get out of bed in the morning... usually not because i dread the day.
but because i feel so good.. and i think there's still a chance i can fall back asleep or at least drift in and out of consciousness for a while, keep wakefulness at bay.
the thing that usually finally makes me get up is coffee. very deep.

and water. standing in the shower.
i love the feel of water warming my skin.
the night is over and the day is ready to begin.
i go outside and take care of my flowers.

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